Life gets in the way

A very strange thing happened to me a couple of weeks ago. I had a heart attack. Actually I had two, but the first one I didn’t recognise as such. Lucky me, that first one didn’t kill me. Like many women, my heart attack didn’t begin with crushing pain in my chest or a weakness or pain that ran down my left arm. I wasn’t short of breath and my heart didn’t pound.

I was miserable because I hadn’t eaten anything outrageous to deserve the horrendous gastric reflux I was suffering that Sunday afternoon. I’d been diagnosed a few months ago with a couple of ulcers and that nasty heartburn thing and I’d stopped taking the prescribed medication. Yeah, yeah, I know, shame on me. Anyway, I thought the darn thing was back… with a vengeance. Nothing seemed to help. It kept me up all night and it was pure stobborness on my part that I went to work the next day. By midmorning I was tired, but feeling fine.

That afternoon, the pain came back, only this time it was centered in my chest. The usual heartburn remedies seemed to work for a short time, but by evening, the pain had changed to something more definite in the middle of my chest. Oddly enough, I had sharp pains over the right breast and my right arm felt like it does when I sleep on it the wrong way. You know, not painful, just wierd feeling and uncomfortable. By this time I was pacing, couldn’t sit, couldn’t stand, couldn’t lay down and, as my husband pointed out, I felt a bit clammy. He was worried, but I wasn’t. I even joked that it couldn’t be my heart. Wrong side, right?

Wrong. Within an hour, the pain was unbearable and right side or wrong, I knew it was my heart when the pain wove down both arms and up into my jaw. My husband drove me to the hospital. Out where we live, it’s faster than calling the life squad.

Our wonderful county hospital, run by the Sisters of Mercy, took great care of me and arranged my transfer to another hospital with a Cardiac Cath lab. Two stents later and we thought it was over, but no, they were just the emergency stents. Two days later, three more were added and here’s the kicker; once again, the pain was all on the right side of my chest, my arm, my jaw.

Now, we’re done.

You’d think I’d be grateful for the extra time off. More time to devote to my writing, but the truth is, I couldn’t concentrate. I’m not a person easily shaken and if truth be told, I’m a prime candidate for heart disease. I smoke, I drink, I’m overweight, there’s a family history and for me, coffee is a food group. My excersize routine requires me to tap my foot vigorously when I’m stuck on a scene. So it’s not that I’m surprised it happened to me.

What shook me up was that I knew. I’ve read the research. I’ve read the articles on women’s health and the odd presentations of heart attacks in women and still, while it was happening to me, I missed it.

So, before I write another word of fiction, let me write this real life truth. Ladies, if you hurt or feel uncomfortable in a way that doesn’t make sense, don’t ignore it. Don’t pretend that back ache comes from something you did last week or that pain in your shoulder and jaw comes from sleeping at an odd angle. And when a loved one suggests you get it checked out, listen! Maybe it is an unexplainable pain or gall bladder or gas! But maybe it’s not. We women are all very quick to care for our loved ones and family. We’re used to putting ourselves at the end of the line, but we need to remind ourselves that we won’t be of any use to our family and friends if we don’t take care of ourselves.

So, God bless and be well and take care of yourselves. From here on in, I will. And see?  I feel a story coming on. Things are already getting back to normal!

Jackie